Saturday, September 8, 2007
Best excuse for speeding
A man bought a new Mercedes and was out on an interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up.
As the needle jumped up to 80mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him.
"They'll never catch me,” he thought to himself and opened her up further.
The needle hit 90, 100, 110 and finally 120 with the lights still behind him. "What in hell am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"I've had a tough shift and this is my last pull over.
I don't feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before you can go!" he said.
"Last week my wife ran off with a cop,” the man said, "and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice night,” said the officer.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up.
As the needle jumped up to 80mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him.
"They'll never catch me,” he thought to himself and opened her up further.
The needle hit 90, 100, 110 and finally 120 with the lights still behind him. "What in hell am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"I've had a tough shift and this is my last pull over.
I don't feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before you can go!" he said.
"Last week my wife ran off with a cop,” the man said, "and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice night,” said the officer.
Are people really this stupid?
Chaser – 9/11 Quiz
Australian TV show The Chaser went to New York and asked some American citizens what date the September 11 attacks occurred on.
Americans are Stupid
Australian TV show The Chaser went to New York and asked some American citizens what date the September 11 attacks occurred on.
Americans are Stupid
Why is that?
Marijuana is safer and less powerful alternative to alcohol that also has many medical benefits, for some reason the federal government takes no issue with violating the rights granted to the states by the constitution to stop any movement to change the total prohibition of this chemical.This year alone approximately $31,637,158,515 of tax payer money has been spent keeping medicine out of the hands of cancer patients and putting those who seek a hangover free buzz behind bars.
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Small Bits of News
Man Arrested For Online Pot Sale
"420" shrubs for sale, wink, wink, nudge, nudge, bust, bust.
Four-hundred-twenty is, of course, stoner's code for pot. And the cops know it.
Click Here To Read More
Dealer Calls Cops After Pot Stash Stolen
A marijuana dealer telephoned police after armed thieves stole his quarter-pound stash of pot. The 19-year-old Felton man told police that two men, one of them armed with a handgun, robbed him at gunpoint as he sat in his car on Tuesday night.
"It was unique to have people who were dealing drugs calling us when they've been ripped off," police spokesman Zach Friend said.
Click Here To Read More
Police Find Meth Lab After Man Misdials
A man trying to call a news station to complain about not getting a FEMA trailer after Hurricane Katrina accidentally dialed 911 and was charged with making methamphetamine after police arrived, authorities said.
Curtiss Randall Coleman was trying to get the number for Biloxi's WLOX-TV on Wednesday just before the 6 p.m. newscast, investigators said. He misdialed when trying to reach directory information and called 911 instead of 411.
Click Here To Read More
Man Attempts Bank Robbery While Standing An Near Officer
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) - An off-duty police officer had plenty of time to get a look at a man who attempted to rob a Metropolitan Bank branch when the suspect first walked right past the uniformed officer - three times.
Langston Robins, 21, faces multiple charges for allegedly handing a bank clerk a note and a gym bag and then fleeing as Officer Chad Herndon tried to arrest him.
"I just don't know why he didn't see a uniformed police officer standing basically right in front of him," Little Rock police spokesman Lt. Terry Hastings said. "My guess is he's just not the brightest of people."
Information from: Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, http://www.arkansasonline.com
Man Found Nude After Clothes Stolen
OELWEIN, Iowa (AP) - Two men have been arrested for stealing a man's clothes and leaving him to wander around naked, officials said. The victim, a 19-year-old Hazleton man, was taken by two men to a rural area west of Oelwein where the men took his clothes at gunpoint, officials with the Fayette County sheriff's office said.
The investigation began after the sheriff's office received a report of a naked man walking down a county road early Sunday morning.
Deputies searched an Oelwein home later in the day and found the victim's clothes and several guns. Billy Ray Staton Jr., 36, and Arthur David Thomas, 53, both of Oelwein, were arrested and charged with first-degree robbery.
Information from: The Gazette, http://www.gazetteonline.com/
"420" shrubs for sale, wink, wink, nudge, nudge, bust, bust.
Four-hundred-twenty is, of course, stoner's code for pot. And the cops know it.
Click Here To Read More
Dealer Calls Cops After Pot Stash Stolen
A marijuana dealer telephoned police after armed thieves stole his quarter-pound stash of pot. The 19-year-old Felton man told police that two men, one of them armed with a handgun, robbed him at gunpoint as he sat in his car on Tuesday night.
"It was unique to have people who were dealing drugs calling us when they've been ripped off," police spokesman Zach Friend said.
Click Here To Read More
Police Find Meth Lab After Man Misdials
A man trying to call a news station to complain about not getting a FEMA trailer after Hurricane Katrina accidentally dialed 911 and was charged with making methamphetamine after police arrived, authorities said.
Curtiss Randall Coleman was trying to get the number for Biloxi's WLOX-TV on Wednesday just before the 6 p.m. newscast, investigators said. He misdialed when trying to reach directory information and called 911 instead of 411.
Click Here To Read More
Man Attempts Bank Robbery While Standing An Near Officer
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) - An off-duty police officer had plenty of time to get a look at a man who attempted to rob a Metropolitan Bank branch when the suspect first walked right past the uniformed officer - three times.
Langston Robins, 21, faces multiple charges for allegedly handing a bank clerk a note and a gym bag and then fleeing as Officer Chad Herndon tried to arrest him.
"I just don't know why he didn't see a uniformed police officer standing basically right in front of him," Little Rock police spokesman Lt. Terry Hastings said. "My guess is he's just not the brightest of people."
Information from: Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, http://www.arkansasonline.com
Man Found Nude After Clothes Stolen
OELWEIN, Iowa (AP) - Two men have been arrested for stealing a man's clothes and leaving him to wander around naked, officials said. The victim, a 19-year-old Hazleton man, was taken by two men to a rural area west of Oelwein where the men took his clothes at gunpoint, officials with the Fayette County sheriff's office said.
The investigation began after the sheriff's office received a report of a naked man walking down a county road early Sunday morning.
Deputies searched an Oelwein home later in the day and found the victim's clothes and several guns. Billy Ray Staton Jr., 36, and Arthur David Thomas, 53, both of Oelwein, were arrested and charged with first-degree robbery.
Information from: The Gazette, http://www.gazetteonline.com/
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