Saturday, November 17, 2007
VOICE OVER - Dennis Dixon for Heisman
Dennis Dixon is the QB for the Oregon Ducks.
The video is very funny.
The video is very funny.
Using Monkey For Business
A warmly dressed monkey walks with other pedestrians in the center of Moscow.Just Damn Funny
Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion."
Joe: "Really?"
Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."
A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.
"I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered. "What did he say," asked the nurse.
"OOPS!"
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since
I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.
"What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"
"Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."
Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the horn by mistake.
She turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."
He replied, "How did you know?"
She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole" afterwards
This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring at a blonde wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen.
Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks, "How do you get into those pants?"
The young woman looks him over and replies, "Well, you could start by buying me a drink."
Joe: "Really?"
Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."
A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.
"I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered. "What did he say," asked the nurse.
"OOPS!"
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since
I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.
"What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"
"Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."
Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the horn by mistake.
She turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."
He replied, "How did you know?"
She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole" afterwards
This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring at a blonde wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen.
Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks, "How do you get into those pants?"
The young woman looks him over and replies, "Well, you could start by buying me a drink."
Drunken Bear in Colorado
The Bear Ate Fermented Apples
It doesn't appear the bear was hurt.
BUT IT IS VERY FUNNY WATCHING THE BEAR STUMBLE
Small Bits of News
Mexico drug hitmen snatch friend's body from morgue
Twenty heavily armed drug hitmen snatched the body of a fellow trafficker from a morgue in northern Mexico after he died in a dramatic helicopter crash, police said on Thursday.
The gunmen killed two policemen as they took the corpse from the morgue in the town of Ensenada, about 65 miles (110 km) south of the U.S. border near San Diego, California."This is unprecedented ... and shows us how far these (drug) organizations can go," said a police spokesman in the border city of Tijuana.
The dead man was thought by police to be a member of the Arellano Felix drug cartel. His fellow traffickers were believed to have wanted his body to take it away for burial without having to identify themselves when claiming the corpse.
Anger management expert admits assault
A Scottish anger management counsellor and anti-domestic violence campaign veteran has been demoted for assaulting his partner.
Vince Hogg, 45, attacked Beverley Burns during a row about the fact a shower was leaking and caused a carpet to get wet at their Fife home.
The former psychiatric nurse tore the 42-year-old's hair out and slammed her against a wall. Yesterday Hogg, who admitted assault, was put on probation for 12 months. His lawyer, Joanne Smith, told a court he was to receive treatment for mental health difficulties.
Landlord Threatens To Release Sex Tape If Rent Isn't Paid
A Panama City Beach condominium owner is accused of using the threat of a sex tape in a failed attempt to collect past-due rent from a tenant.
Panama City Beach Police Department officials said Thursday that Jill Marita Munger, 31, of Lynn Haven, tracked down her tenant shortly after the victim moved out.
Click Here To Read More
Twenty heavily armed drug hitmen snatched the body of a fellow trafficker from a morgue in northern Mexico after he died in a dramatic helicopter crash, police said on Thursday.
The gunmen killed two policemen as they took the corpse from the morgue in the town of Ensenada, about 65 miles (110 km) south of the U.S. border near San Diego, California."This is unprecedented ... and shows us how far these (drug) organizations can go," said a police spokesman in the border city of Tijuana.
The dead man was thought by police to be a member of the Arellano Felix drug cartel. His fellow traffickers were believed to have wanted his body to take it away for burial without having to identify themselves when claiming the corpse.
Anger management expert admits assault
A Scottish anger management counsellor and anti-domestic violence campaign veteran has been demoted for assaulting his partner.
Vince Hogg, 45, attacked Beverley Burns during a row about the fact a shower was leaking and caused a carpet to get wet at their Fife home.
The former psychiatric nurse tore the 42-year-old's hair out and slammed her against a wall. Yesterday Hogg, who admitted assault, was put on probation for 12 months. His lawyer, Joanne Smith, told a court he was to receive treatment for mental health difficulties.
Landlord Threatens To Release Sex Tape If Rent Isn't Paid
A Panama City Beach condominium owner is accused of using the threat of a sex tape in a failed attempt to collect past-due rent from a tenant.
Panama City Beach Police Department officials said Thursday that Jill Marita Munger, 31, of Lynn Haven, tracked down her tenant shortly after the victim moved out.
Click Here To Read More
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