Friday, June 29, 2007

Farting Girl - Just For Laughs

Cops Chase Weinermobile

TUCSON, Ariz. (AP) - Arizona State Police thought they had a hot one on Interstate 10 - that Oscar Meyer Weinermobile cruising through Tucson. Instead, they ended up with some - er - mustard on their face.

The famed Weinermobile, which travels across the nation promoting Kraft Foods' Oscar Meyer brand, was spotted by a state Department of Public Safety officer Wednesday morning on I-10, said officer Carmen Figueroa, a DPS spokeswoman.

The officer, in an unmarked car, ran a computer check and the license plate came back as stolen.

On came the lights, and the dog was nabbed. Other officers headed for the scene as backup.

But after some checks with the Columbia Police Department in Wisconsin, which had registered the warning on the "YUMMY" plate on the traveling ad, the officers backed off.

Wisconsin police had intended to make a note on the computer log that the plate only belonged on the traveling hot dog and that it was stolen if on any other vehicle, Figueroa said. Somehow the distinction didn't translate well, and the state DPS is now changing the computer entry.

Several "DUMB ASSES" in the news

Thief asks for "time out" in police chase
Tue Jun 26, 9:23 AM ET
Philippine police chased down an unfit thief on Tuesday after he ran out of breath and asked his pursuers for a "time out."
"He was panting and gasping for air when we caught up with him after a 500 meter sprint," Erwin Buenceso, one of the arresting officers, told local radio station dzBB.
Buenceso said the man and an accomplice broke into a house in the Philippine capital and stole two expensive mobile phones. Screams from the residence alerted a local police patrol, which gave chase.
The robber asked for a "time out" using hand signals.
After he regained his composure, police seized the two stolen phones and brought him to a station for questioning.

Man gets 10 years in license shooting
Wed Jun 27, 11:20 PM ET
A 49-year-old truck driver has been sentenced to 10 years in prison for shooting his wife after she failed to renew his driver's license.
Gary Alan Hemsted pleaded no contest earlier this month to attempted voluntary manslaughter, using a firearm and causing great bodily injury in the wounding of his wife, Lisa, 42, in 2005.
Shasta County sheriff's deputies said Hemsted became angry after he was cited for driving with an expired license and blamed his wife for failing to renew it.
Detective Steve Grashoff testified that Hemsted threatened to shoot his wife's horse and fired a round from a .22-caliber rifle that narrowly missed his wife and hit the family's barn.
Lisa Hemsted ran down the driveway of the couple's home while her husband gave chase in his pickup truck. As Lisa Hemsted climbed over a fence to try to get away, Gary Hemsted aimed his rifle at her, told her "you're dead" and fired a shot that hit her in the right thigh, Grashoff said.
A sheriff's patrol car was pulling up as the shooting took place.
Hemsted's attorney, Richard Maxion, said his client could end up serving a little more than six years in prison after the 796 days he has spent in jail and any credits he earns for good behavior are deducted from the sentence.

Wife blames shooting on burglar alarm
Wed Jun 27, 11:21 PM ET
A woman held on a gun charge claims she accidentally shot her husband in the head after becoming startled when the couple's burglar alarm activated, authorities said Wednesday.
April Moylan, 39, was charged with possession of a firearm by a convicted felon and ordered held Wednesday on $75,000 bond, according to the St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office.
Prosecutors were not immediately seeking additional charges.
"The state attorney's office continues to review the facts of the case, and that review is ongoing," Sheriff Ken Mascara said Wednesday. "That means it is possible there could be additional charges in the future."
It was not immediately clear if she had an attorney.
Michael Eugene Moylan, 45, initially told authorities he awoke early Tuesday morning with a severe headache. The couple went to a hospital where a bullet was discovered in the man's head.
Investigators initially thought Moylan had been hit by a stray bullet, but later realized the couple's story did not match up, Mascara said.
The couple finally told authorities that April Moylan sleeps with a loaded .32-caliber revolver under her pillow. They said that when the burglar alarm sounded at about 4 a.m. Tuesday, she grabbed the gun and it accidentally discharged, shooting her husband in the head just behind his ear.
Mascara said the couple told authorities they couldn't simply call 911 because both are convicted felons and are not allowed to own a gun so they concocted the headache story.

Man Pays $4.88 for Plasma TV at Wal-Mart
June 29, 2007
MONROE, La. (AP) - While Wal-Mart is known for dropping its prices, one West Monroe man took the ad campaign seriously when he dropped the price of a plasma television from $984 to $4.88. Police arrested Chandon L. Simms, 23, on Tuesday at the retail store on a charge of felony theft.

According to police reports, Simms carried a 42-inch Sanyo Plasma TV to a self-checkout aisle after switching the original price tag of $984 with one for only $4.88. Wal-Mart Loss Prevention officers witnessed the alleged transaction and called police.

When the store officers stopped Simms on his way out the door, he produced a receipt for a television purchased at the West Monroe Wal-Mart, authorities said.

Simms told officers that he purchased a TV from the West Monroe store and planned to return that one and keep the one he purchased for only $4.88 from the Monroe store. He was then arrested and booked into the Ouachita Correctional Center.

Drivers arrested for speeding at 141 mph
Wed Jun 27, 5:30 PM ET
The Washington State Patrol says a trooper arrested two men speeding 141 mph on I-5 in Snohomish County. The patrol says the trooper thought he was hearing an airplane early Sunday as the cars whizzed by going north, a 2005 BMW 330i with a 2007 Honda Accord right behind.
The trooper caught up with the cars because they had stopped for a passenger from one of the cars to get into the other.
The 22-year-old driver of the BMW and the 18-year-old driver of the Honda were booked into the Snohomish County Jail for charges of reckless driving.

What every man dreams about

I like what I see

Impulsive Buying

A Kids Reply

A teacher was giving a lesson to her young students on the circulation of blood in their bodies.
Trying to explain the lesson clearer, she told her class if I stood on my head, the blood as you know would run into my head and I would turn red in the face.
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright position the blood doesn't run into my feet and make them turn red?"
A young boy shouted, "Because your feet ain't empty."

Bush and a visit to New Zealand

A visit to New Zealand by United States President George W. Bush is being actively considered in Washington.

The visit would follow his attendance at the annual Apec summit in Sydney on September 8 and 9.

Would you like George Bush to visit NZ?
Here is a selection of Your Views:

Dave (Auckland CBD) New Zealand customs would never allow well known terrorists into the country, so why let Bush? He is responsible for the hundred's of thousands of deaths in the middle east since his "coalition" of killers invaded Iraq, just so "Daddy and friends" can get their hands on the oil and also make enormous amounts of money in arms dealings. Bush is not welcome in NZ! Let's not let the evil monkey set foot in God zone!

Martina (Auckland)We should not be giving Bush the impression that he is welcome here, because he is obviously not. I would resent us funding his useless little visit, too.

Richard I would welcome Bush into NZ, he is very welcome here. And I hope our Government gives him the welcome he deserves and arrests him, and charges him with war crimes and crimes against humanity. This war criminal should be treated like all war criminals.

Steve Schoenberg I would favor Bush visiting only if we promptly arrest him for war crimes. Providing he is in jail, I would favor him staying a while.

John W No thanks! The only place Bush deserves to visit is a court for war criminals, along with his blood-soaked greedy mates Rove and Cheney.

For every 100 girls

There are a lot of interesting facts with U.S. Census data to back it up.
For instance:
For every 100 girls that are conceived 115 boys are conceived.

For every 100 girls enrolled in gifted and talented programs in public elementary and secondary schools there are 94 boys enrolled.

For every 100 girls diagnosed with a learning disability 276 boys are diagnosed with a learning disability.

For every 100 women enrolled in college there are 77 men enrolled.

For every 100 women ages 18 to 21 in correctional facilities there are 1430 men behind bars.


A Texas district attorney has refused to prosecute any of the 24 alleged pedophiles ensnared in a sting filmed for NBC's "Dateline: To Catch a Predator" series.
Among those caught last year in Murphy, Texas was a prosecutor from a neighboring county who committed suicide when police showed up to arrest him.
The Murphy city manager who approved the operation lost his job in the ensuing furor. And now the local district attorney is refusing to prosecute any of the 24 remaining men, saying many of the cases were tainted by the involvement of amateurs.

Sexy Car Wash Advertising

A COUPLE have been ordered to remove their cheeky car wash firm slogan that promised: “The best hand-job in town.”
The sign on the side of a lorry also showed a bikini-clad blonde soaping down a pink Cadillac.
But councilors in Goole, East Yorks, branded it inappropriate and Soapy Rides owners Nigel and Michaela Kennings, both 37, were fined £400 with £600 costs by magistrates.
Michaela, 37, said: “It’s absolutely ridiculous. The sign has caused great amusement to customers.
“We are surrounded by old warehouses and this brightened up the area.”
A council spokesman said: “We asked a number of times for the sign to be removed.”

Backwards Feet

How smart are you?

How smart are you?

I got 19 out of 25 right with out cheating.
How many can you get right?
Post yours under comments.

Inflation - Most things have gone up in price...

Of all the items listed below, the price of only one item has gone way down since Bush took office. Everything else has become much more expensive.

Dozen eggs
Gallon of Gasoline
Health Care
Gallon of Milk
8-ball of cocaine
College Tuition
Loaf of bread

That one thing is cocaine. Now I'm not really an economics expert, but I do make sure to watch both Fox News and Lou Dobbs in order to get both sides, so I think I know what I'm talking about. The lower price must be because all the money being spent to destroy these drugs in Colombia is making Americans feel guilty about continuing to buy it - and the demand is dropping. And since President Bush makes everyone cherish life so much, the demand for things we need to live is going up. As a result, the terrorists are getting much less money for their drugs than they were just 5 years ago while good people are getting wealthier.

MSNBC rips Paris report