Monday, October 8, 2007

What do you expect he's a Russian


Where were they at when I was their age?


Hey, you want to clean my toilet?


HUT! HUT!


Looks like Regis is going to grab Kelly's ass

"Suckers"


Baby Shower Cake

Like she needs to know that

Are you always running out of toilet paper at a bad time?

Run out of toilet paper 1/12th as often
Have a big wall next to your toilet and don't like running out of toilet paper?
Mounting more toilet paper holders on the wall is a simple way to keep it from happening.


Install twelve toilet paper holders


Husband gets tattoo of his wife - then discovers she is having affair

After 15 happy years with his wife, Alan Jenkins decided it was time for the ultimate expression of love. So, determined to prove his devotion, he had a life-size image of her face - along with those of their two daughters - tattooed on his back.
The painful procedure took 20 hours and cost £870.


Unfortunately for the besotted Alan, it also backfired on a monumental scale after Lisa, 36, absconded with a 25-year-old Latvian hunk she had met at work.

How to start a bonfire using a jet engine

How Dirty is Your Computer Keyboard?

How many germs live on your keyboard?

Studies have shown that your keyboard and mouse are some of the most germ-ridden devices you own, surpassing even doorknobs and toilet seats.
Take this short quiz to see how many germs lovingly call your keyboard home.

1,438,080How Many Germs Live On Your Keyboard?

FOR THE AVERAGE PERSON WITH CHILDREN AND PETS

There are about 3,640,140 germs on your keyboard right now!
That's equivalent to the number of germs on 728 toilet seats.

Small Bits od News

52 Cent Doughnut May Cost Man 30 Years To Life
Shoplifters at Country Mart tend to favor cold medicines and packaged meats. They used to steal cigarettes, too, until tobacco was moved behind the counter. But the doughnuts were never a target for thieves.
Country Mart's doughnuts - fried fresh daily in the store - sell for just 52 cents each. That is why the "shoplifters will be prosecuted" signs are displayed in aisle 4 with the pricey pain and allergy pills, and not in aisle 5 beside the glass doughnut case with its tiger tails, jelly-filleds and eclairs.
Click Here To Read More

Assault Suspect Gives Police Officer "Wet Willie" Following Arrest
A Bartlesville man found that giving a police officer a "wet willie" after his arrest Thursday was not such a good idea.
According to court records, Louis Carlos Perales, 38, picked up an additional charge of assault and battery on a police officer after he put his finger in his mouth and then into an officer's ear.
Click Here To Read More

Jury Rejects 'Spiked' Stripping Defense
A man who stripped naked in a Fayette County convenience store for no apparent reason has been convicted of indecent exposure and criminal mischief.
A jury rejected the defense offered by 26-year-old Gregory David Moore Jr. The Uniontown man said he didn't realize what he was doing because he had consumed a spiked drink at a party.
Click Here To Read More

Prankish Husband Mistaken For Armed Robber
A couple staying at a Florida motel became armed robbery suspects when an employee reported seeing someone in a mask entering their room.
It turned out the masked intruder was the husband, who had donned a hockey mask to play a joke on his wife, The Cocoa Beach Tribune reported.
Click Here To Read More

IT'S PAY BACK TIME

Prankster gets brick wall for birthday

When Laura Bain tried to leave her house to take her four-year-old daughter to school, she literally came up against a brick wall. Practical jokers had struck at the home she shares with boyfriend David Devanna, bricking up and cementing the front door from the outside. Mr Devanna's friends carried out the handiwork to mark his 24th birthday - as a way of getting him back for his pranks.
As well as wallpapering the front window with a huge birthday message, his friends also set to work on his beloved Golf GTI. They covered the inside of the car with balloons and string, then tightly wrapped strips of Cellophane around its doors so Mr Devanna could not get in. The jokers sprayed it with foam and attached the body of a toy rabbit to its bonnet, with fake blood scattered around. The father-of-three said he suspected his friends would mark his birthday in some way.
He said: "My oldest daughter came running, saying: 'We can't get out the front door.' I was half asleep at the time and didn't know what she was talking about. I had to go out of the back door, and then I saw my car had been done. I thought they'd do something, but I never expected my door to be bricked up. I take it that's my birthday present."

There is no end of people doing "DUMB ASS" things