Sunday, January 18, 2009

The Funniest Billboards






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That's Just Crazy












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I'm Lovin' It

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2 sides of everything




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How do you think this ended?

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SHES GETTING AWAY

Actually she's jumping the fence for a late night swim at a public pool.
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Poop cakes are great for every occasion even weddings...

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Food for the Penis Obsessed

Creepy guy gnaws on penis bread,
which sports a generous heaping of smegma on the tip.
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Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

From earning six figures to hoping for $7 an hour
In her best year as a mortgage broker, Laura Glick from Aurora, Colorado says she made "six figures." This week she was one of more than 1,200 people attending a job fair and applying for one of 150 jobs paying between $7 and $12 an hour at a new Kohl's department store in a Denver, Colorado, suburb.
She has been out of work for seven months and never thought it would take her this long to find a job. It's not the kind of job she thought she would be applying for, but she has a case of the jitters just the same.
"Your heart starts to race, and you get nervous even though it is not some big job like you used to have," she said. "I'll take anything at this point."
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Do wealthy men give women more orgasms?
Scientists have found that the pleasure women get from making love is directly linked to the size of their partner’s bank balance.
They found that the wealthier a man is, the more frequently his partner has orgasms.
"Women’s orgasm frequency increases with the income of their partner," said Dr Thomas Pollet, the Newcastle University psychologist behind the research.
He believes the phenomenon is an "evolutionary adaptation" that is hard-wired into women, driving them to select men on the basis of their perceived quality.
The study is certain to prove controversial, suggesting that women are inherently programmed to be gold-diggers.
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Motorist fined for eating bread at the wheel
Stunned Ediri Tsekiri was fined £60 and had three penalty points slapped on her licence for munching a two-inch long fragment from a sandwich she'd eaten earlier, when she was stopped by an officer in a marked police van.
He informed Ediri that she had been seen eating while driving and that she could have killed a child if one had stepped into the road while she was distracted by eating.
"I ate a crust that was 2 inches long and and I was certainly no more distracted than if I had changed gear or switched radio stations."
He tried to suggest that what it was 'worse' than using a mobile phone while driving, but I don't accept that for a moment. The whole procedure lasted less than a second.
"Everyone takes one hand off the wheel at some point quite legitimately when they change gear, roll down the window or change the heater settings."
Police officers don't drive with both hands on the wheel at every moment.
"In fact, the dashboard of the police van was bristling with all kinds of equipment, including a computer screen which is touch controlled."
If I had been sneezing that could have been more dangerous than eating a morsel of bread.
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Supreme Court will hear case of stripsearched teen
The 13-year-old girl who was strip-searched by school officials looking for ibuprofen will have her case heard by the U.S. Supreme Court:
Zero Tolerance requires zero brains
"... officials at Safford Middle School in Safford, Arizona forced eighth-grader Savana Redding to prove she was not concealing drugs in her crotch or cleavage... Savana, an honors student with no history of disciplinary trouble or drug problems, said she didn't know anything about the pills and agreed to a search of her backpack, which turned up nothing incriminating. Wilson nevertheless instructed a female secretary to strip-search Savana under the school nurse's supervision, without even bothering to contact the girl's mother. The secretary had Savana take off all her clothing except her underwear. Then she told her to "pull her bra out and to the side and shake it, exposing her breasts," and "pull her underwear out at the crotch and shake it, exposing her pelvic area." And the drug they were searching for? ---- Ibuprofen (Advil)
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The [appeals] court wrote: "Common sense informs us that directing a 13-year-old girl to remove her clothes, partially revealing her breasts and pelvic area, for allegedly possessing ibuprofen ... was excessively intrusive."
The court said the school went too far in its effort to create a drug- and crime-free classroom. "The overzealousness of school administrators in efforts to protect students has the tragic impact of traumatizing those they claim to serve. And all this to find prescription-strength ibuprofen."
In its appeal to the high court, the school district said requiring a legal standard of "probable cause" to conduct student searches would cast a "roadblock to the kind of swift and effective response that is too often needed to protect the very safety of students, particularly from the threats posed by drugs and weapons."
The high court has had a mixed record over the years on students' rights. The court could now be asked to clarify the extent of student rights involving searches, and the discretion of officials over those for whom they have responsibility.
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Never get tired of harmless pranks

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EYE F**KED

Blowing your nose when it's broken makes your eye look like a vagina.
A sparring session lead to a broken nose.
A broken nose lead to an eye that can be inflated like a balloon.
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What are the black trucks in a Presidential Motorcade?

Have you ever wondered what all those extra SUVs are in the Presidential or VIP motorcades? You know, the ones with severely tinted windows. The SUV's that no one gets in or out. Maybe they are Unmarked 'black helicopters' on four wheels...
Well, wonder no more. They have a 6 barreled 7.62 mm mini gun that fires over 4,000 rounds per minute the wipers need to be turned on to remove spent casings when the weapon is firing.
Listen to this baby go off.
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