You're already dead why care!"

One day a guy died and found himself in hell. As he was wallowing in despair, he had his first meeting with a demon. The demon asked, "Why so glum?" The guy responded, "What do you think? I'm in hell!" "Hell's not so bad," the demon said. "We actually have a lot of fun down here. Are you a drinking man?" "Sure," the man said, "I love to drink." "Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays all we do is drink Whiskey, Vodka, Tequila, Beer and wine coolers. We drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!" The guy is astounded. "Damn, that sounds great."

"Are you a smoker?" the demon asked. "You better believe it!" "You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out and if you get cancer, no biggie. You're already dead, remember?"

The demon continued. "I bet you like to gamble." "Why yes, as a matter of fact I do." "Wednesdays you can gamble all you want Craps, blackjack, roulette, poker and slots whatever you want to play. If you go bankrupt, well, you're dead anyhow".

Are you into drugs?" The guy said, "Are you kidding? I love drugs! You don't mean...?" "That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack or meth. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, you're dead, and who cares!"

"Wow," the guy said, starting to feel better about his situation, "I never realized Hell was such a cool place!" The demon said, "Are you gay?" "No" came the reply. "Ooooh, you're gonna hate Fridays!"

Oh Hell No!