Logic

1. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead’s.
2. The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
3. I live in my own little world, but it’s OK, everyone knows me here.
4. I saw a rather large woman wearing a sweatshirt with Guess on it. I said, “Thyroid problem?”
5. I don’t do drugs ’cause I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.
6. A sign In a Chinese pet store: “Buy one dog, get one flea.”
7. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
8. I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
9. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
10. I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen too many of them get elected.
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Thanks god