It's really not that difficult...

How to make a Woman Happy
To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be:
1.) a friend
2.) a companion
3.) a lover
4.) a brother
5.) a father
6.) a master
7.) a chef
8.) a decorator
9.) a stylist
10.) a psychologist
11.) a psychiatrist
12.) a good listener
13.) an organizer
14.) a good father
15.) very clean
16.) sympathetic
17.) athletic
18.) warm
19.) attentive
20.) gallant
21.) intelligent
22.) funny
23.) creative
24.) tender
25.) strong
26.) understanding
27.) tolerant
28.) prudent
29.) ambitious
30.) capable
31.) courageous
32.) determined
33.) true
34.) dependable
35.) passionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
give her compliments regularly
love shopping
be honest
be very rich
not stress her out
not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
give her lots of time, especially time for herself
give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
Never to forget:* birthdays* anniversaries* arrangements she makes
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How to make a Man Happy
From The Perfect Woman:
1.) "I'll swallow it all...I just love the taste!"
2.) "Are you sure you've had enough beer?"
3.) "I'm bored. Let's shave my pussy!"
4.) "Oh come on, what do ya say we get a good porno movie, a case of beer and have my friend Lacoda over for a threesome!"
5.) "If I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust!"
6.) "I know it's a lot tighter back there but would you please try again?"
7.) "You're so sexy when you're hung over."
8.) "I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping."
9.) "Let's subscribe to Hustler."
10.) "Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?"
11.) "Say, let's go down to the mall so you can check out women's asses."
12.) "I'll be out painting the house."
13.) "I love it when you play golf on Sunday's, I just wish you had time to play on Saturday, too." 14.) "Honey, our new neighbor's is sunbathing again, come see!"
15.) "I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house."
16.) "No, no, I'll take the car to have the oil changed."
17.) "Your mother did a great job raising you."
18.) "Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's Day thing and buy yourself new clubs."
19.) "I understand fully. Our anniversary comes every year for God's sake. You go hunting with the guys, it's a wonderful stress reliever."
20.) "Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?"
21.) "Not the fucking mall again, come on let's go to that new strip joint!"
22.) "Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8."
23.) "You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night feedings."
24.) "That was a great fart! Do another one!"
25.) "I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head for ya!"
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Mad Izatie said...
Great post, perfect example of gender stereotyping.