Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

'Ecstasy was for my dog'
Ecstasy pills 'were for dog birth control'
An Australian businessman who pleaded not guilty to possessing more than 70 ecstasy tablets told Darwin Magistrates Court he thought they were birth control pills for his dog. Steven James Dwyer, 48, pleaded guilty to possessing a trafficable amount of methamphetamine, but contested the charge of possessing an amount of ecstasy tablets, saying he thought the pills would stop his pet sharpeis from breeding.He was found guilty and convicted on both charges - magistrate Vince Luppino adding he did not find the excuse for having a trafficable amount of ecstasy "reasonable". Dwyer told the court the ecstasy tablets - MDMA - had come into his hands when he was outside a Katherine Laundromat, after he met a man with a female sharpei dog.


Why can't I find a job like this?
You know -- one where you don't go to work, then you're allowed to resign. Then you still get a fat pension.
Consider this latest outrage.
First, officials found that three detectives with Tampa's Police Department were someplace else, including at home, when they were supposed to be on duty.
How'd they know?
They put GPS devices in their cars.
The detectives could face criminal charges for getting taxpayer money for work they didn't do, but a source says because they resigned instead of being fired, the state attorney's office won't file a case against them.And because the detectives weren't fired, they'll get their pensions.
Two of the detectives, making $83,969 a year, will collect $52,864 and $55,633 respectively for the rest of their lives.
The third detective, making $80,433, will get a yearly check for $44,644.
The detectives also were in a tax-payer funded retirement plan.
The plan allows them to receive one-time payments between $48,455 to $222,534 as part of their separation package.
Is it just us or does this seem downright criminal?
What a steal: Skip work but get fired and get paid for life.

DUI suspect: 'I just did cardio and my hips hurt'
Nice try. But, no, the cop didn't buy it.
After a Crestview cop stopped a man driving badly, the dude tried to weasle out of the sobriety test.
"....I will tell you I just did cardio and my hips hurt," the man answered,
Later, during the one-leg stand, the man said he would be unable to stand on one leg because he was too cold and had arthritis in both knees.
"Look, I will call someone to pick me up, someone who is sober, then we can forget all this happened," the driver suggested to the officer.
Not an option, the cop said.
Instead, the driver was charged with DUI and went to jail.
A passenger in the car slept through the entire ordeal.
Musta been some cardio that duo was doing.
Deputy finds marijuana in diaper bag
A 25-year-old Fort Walton Beach woman was charged with marijuana possession after an Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office deputy saw her squat down next to a car and "discard something."
Since the woman had appeared to reach into the back seat, the deputy got permission to search the car and found a baggy of pot in a diaper bag on the rear floorboard.

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