Sunday, April 13, 2008

Summer Time in Japan

Well, either that style better get to the US quickly, or I’m gonna have to book a flight to the beaches of Japan this summer!

Oh yeah, got my stamp of approval!!!!!!!!

That just looks like the worst wedgie ever

The New California $5.00 Bill

Dogs x 5

Dog Loves to Caddy

Tree Climbing Dog
Meet Kodi and she can scale a Bruce Spruce.

Surfer Dog

Two Legged Dog

Two-legged Dog named "Sugar"

Public Toilet – With an Audience

Anonymous said...
"Very Public"

That's A Nice Ass

A Most Humiliating Experience

The Unpredictable Shitter

For sale: 14-year-old Virgin

Thirty miles west of the Taj Mahal, on the road to the pink city of Jaipur, tourists on buses pass a sight that the guide books rarely mention.
A mile beyond the town of Bharatpur in Rajasthan, where the highway is being widened to four lanes, traffic slows down for roadworks. But the workmen who lounge by their bulldozers have their eyes on something else - a cluster of makeshift shelters where girls, several under 18 and at least two younger than 15, can be seen strolling or sitting, in view of the dusty carriageway.
Tonight, one girl in particular is attracting attention as she sits on a stool by a fire so that she can be seen by passing vehicles. Her heavily made-up, striking face and beautiful pink sari make her look as if she were on her way to a party. But the truth is different. Suli, 14, is a virgin and a bidding war is being held for the right to be the first to sleep with her.


1. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead’s.
2. The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
3. I live in my own little world, but it’s OK, everyone knows me here.
4. I saw a rather large woman wearing a sweatshirt with Guess on it. I said, “Thyroid problem?”
5. I don’t do drugs ’cause I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.
6. A sign In a Chinese pet store: “Buy one dog, get one flea.”
7. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
8. I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
9. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
10. I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen too many of them get elected.
Thanks god

Did you know.............

There is Unlimited Supply of Insane People
Missing Idiots

Couple willing to give up daughter because of school

A couple says they are prepared to give up all legal claims to their daughter for the sake of her education. But council officials last night warned that the couple's idea of handing over their daughter's upbringing to a distant relative might not work.
Parents James and Stella Coils are considering putting ten-year-old daughter Rebecca into the guardianship of a great aunt, Mary Holland, who lives half a mile from the comprehensive school of their choice, after she was refused a place because the family lives outside the catchments area. Call center workers Mr and Mrs. Coils came up with the idea of changing their daughter's legal guardianship because they are desperate for her to attend Manor College of Technology, in Hartlepool.
She has instead been offered a place at St Hild's Church of England Secondary School, five miles from their home, in Seaton Carew, near Hartlepool. Explaining their plan, reached after much heart-searching, 34- year-old Mr Coils said: "Rebecca's education will shape her into the person she becomes - so we will give her up to get her into the right school."

Noah in 2008

In the year 2008, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said: "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints saying: "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no Ark. "Noah!" He roared, "I'm about to start the rain, where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord" begged Noah, "but things have changed. I needed a building permit & I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system on the ark. My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeals Board for a decision.

Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark’s move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.

Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!

When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.

Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.

Immigration and Naturalization is checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work.

The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience.

To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."

"So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord: "the government beat me to it."

Small Bits of News

Fake 911 Call Earns Man Jail Time
MANCHESTER, MA -- A man will spend two months in jail for making a false 911 call. Jimmy Tyler called police twice to get them to come out to his apartment and shut down a loud party next door. The police refused both times, saying they had a lot of other calls. Tyler called back a third time, but this time he claimed he shot someone. Now he's off to jail.
Teenage mother threw baby at social worker
A teenage mother whose newborn baby was taken from her by social workers has been banned from seeing her son after she threw him across the room during a fight with the boy's father.
The 18-year-old, known only as G, also narrowly missed hitting the little boy's head when she hurled a mobile phone charger at her former partner.
The fight occurred while the parents were visiting the baby, who is currently in foster care, during a session supervised by social workers from Nottingham City Council.