Sunday, July 5, 2009

800 Pound Fat Pig


Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

Cabbie Smells Danger
Chicago taxi driver didn’t have Mace handy, so made do with what he had his deodorant 
Police in suburban Chicago say a taxi driver who didn't have Mace handy when he was attacked by a knife-wielding passenger instead disarmed the man with a can of aerosol deodorant.
Elgin Deputy Police Chief Jeff Swoboda says the 51-year-old cabbie picked up the male passenger early Thursday outside a casino. Swoboda said the driver grew suspicious when the man offered several destinations, so he surreptitiously placed the small can of deodorant between his legs.
Shortly afterward, the passenger put a knife to the driver's neck and demanded money. The cabbie sprayed the deodorant in the man's eyes, causing him to drop the knife.
Cop nabs robber minutes after graduating from police school
Rookie NYPD officer 'off to great start' as he makes post-ceremony arrest
A New York Police Department rookie just couldn't wait to get started.
One of the NYPD's newest officers made his first arrest Thursday just minutes after graduating from the Police Academy in a ceremony at Madison Square Garden.
Officer Dariel Firpo, 23, was leaving the midtown Manhattan ceremony when he saw a 79-year-old man being robbed of his wallet and thrown to the ground by a mugger, police said.
The mugger tried to run away, but Firpo caught him without incident, they said.
"Officer Firpo made us all proud," police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said. "He's off to a great start."
The man Firpo arrested, Jeffrey Grant, was being charged with robbery. Grant, 47, has 48 previous arrests and was just released last week from Sing Sing Correctional Facility in Ossining, N.Y., after serving time for a robbery conviction, police said.
Son of ‘master counterfeiter’ arrested
Like notorious father, Chicago man accused of passing phony $100 bills
The 18-year-old son of master counterfeiter Art Williams Jr., whose life is chronicled in a new book "The Art of Making Money," has been arrested on charges of passing fake $100 bills.
Arthur Williams III, of Chicago, is accused of selling counterfeit bills containing serial numbers matching $112,900 in counterfeit currency that has been circulated nationwide, the U.S. attorney's office for the Northern District of Illinois announced Wednesday. 
He was arrested Monday by Secret Service agents and charged in federal court. The teen was released on $10,000 bond into his mother's custody. No trial date has been set.
Authorities say Williams sold 64 fake $100 bills three times in June. Witnesses told authorities they purchased the counterfeit bills for $20 each.
If convicted, Williams faces a maximum penalty of 20 years in prison and a $250,000 fine.
What can you do in your pool for fun?
A northwest suburban woman complained to police that her neighbor was swimming naked and having sex in his pool, while the neighbor complained about the woman invading his privacy.
On June 20, a resident of the 500 block of White Pine Road in Buffalo Grove called police about 5:30 a.m. to complain that two women and a man were swimming naked in the pool next door and performing sex acts with each other, according to police.
Responding officers said all three were indeed naked and the women were hovering around the male.
The man, 20, was angry that the neighbor reported him and his two friends, 21 and 20, and told officers he believed his rights were being violated and she had no right to look out her window to watch him in his pool.
After police explained village public indecency laws, the three dressed and went inside.
Someone airing their dirty laundry on public poles
Most people prefer not to air their dirty laundry.
Someone around Beecher Avenue is reveling in it, keeping police trying to figure out who is hanging dirty underwear over street signs — and why.
Jacksonville police received a complaint about 7:10 a.m. Thursday about people in the area partying every night and leaving trash all over.
Not to mention hanging discarded drawers on street signs.
A responding officer found a pair of skivvies hanging from a "no parking" sign on West Beecher Avenue.
The officer went to a nearby residence to investigate, but no one answered.
After a brief attempt to hamper the offender, police decided to, ahem, clothes the case.

Man Was Charged With Penis Artistry On TV

A Cincinnati, Ohio man is accused of drawing a large picture of the male anatomy on the screen of a pricey plasma television inside a Colerain Township Sears store.

Police responded to the store in the 9000 block of Colerain Avenue around 5:30 Thursday after someone reported seeing surveillance video of a man drawing a 12-inch penis on a display television.

Twenty-year-old Jordan Puckett of Germantown is now facing one misdemeanor charge of criminal damaging. The plasma TV was priced at $1599.99, police say, but is now unsalable because Puckett allegedly used a permanent marker for his illustration.

A motive is not yet known.


Men agree on what's hot in the opposite sex (but girls do not)

Men agree on what is attractive in the opposite sex far more than women do, says a study.
The survey of 4,000 adults found that most men liked women who were thin and
posing seductively.
Women, in contrast, were enticed by a far wider range of male characteristics.