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Joanne Casey said...
Gotta give the big girl credit, I couldn't do that.
Gotta give the big girl credit, I couldn't do that.
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.
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Thanks god
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Small Bits of News
Noisy man fined for grunting
A grunting weightlifter has been fined £70 for making his neighbors' lives a misery – by exercising too loudly.
Giran Jobe's two-hour training sessions in his top-floor flat were so loud they reached 100 decibels – the same level as a rock concert.
'All I do is exercise and work out with my weights. I am trying to keep fit. I cannot believe I got taken to court for exercising.'
.
Man believes dead wife is contacting him on cell phone
Frank Jones admits he believes wife Sadie is contacting him from beyond the grave ... by mobile phone.Mr Jones, who runs his own scrap metal business, said: "Just after Sadie died I came home and I felt like I didn't want to go in the house."I got a missed call on my mobile, but it didn't ring. The call was from my own home number, but there was nobody in the house." "Then when I went inside there was a smell like cigarettes which Sadie used to smoke and the smell of her perfume."Mr Jones said the family has also received strange text messages, which they believe to be from her. He added: "We buried her with her phone. There have been messages with words Sadie would say but there's no number."
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Cops call woman about car; she tries to buy crack
LAKE CHARLES, La. - Police in Louisiana are crediting "sheer luck and stupidity" for the arrests of two people on drug charges after officers made a routine phone call. It all started last week when two police officers pulled over a car for a traffic violation. The driver could not produce identification or a valid driver's license, so the officers suspected the car was stolen.
They called the registered owner and left a message. When the owner called back, officers say, she apparently thought the message was from a drug dealer.
She was busted for allegedly trying to buy crack cocaine.
.
Man Robs Store Where He Frequently Did Business
LOUISVILLE, Ky. - A Louisville man is in jail after police said he robbed a check-cashing store where he often did business. Investigators said 25-year-old Alvin Gist robbed the First American Check Cashing store in the 5500 block of New Cut Road Tuesday.
A clerk recognized him as a frequent customer, checked his address and notified police.
When officers went to Gist's home, they said they found the money and the clothes worn during the robbery.
.
10-year-old Girl Tried To Rob Store
FRANKLIN, Tenn. - Police in Franklin said a 10-year-old girl tried to rob a Mapco Express late Monday night. Video: Police Say 10-Year-Old Tried To Rob Store The clerk said the main reason he called police was that he was worried about the girl being out so late and trying to rob a store.
He said he wasn’t sure what the girl wanted until she threw a rock that struck him in the chest. The rock was all she was armed with. The clerk said he was so stunned that the girl had to ask the clerk three times for the money.
.
Baby Born in Texas Middle School Bathroom Dies in Flush Attempt
BAYTOWN, Texas — A 14-year-old Texas teenager on Wednesday gave birth in the bathroom of a middle school but the baby died when the mother allegedly tried to flush it.
Police said the student told counselors she had given birth and attempted to flush the baby inside a restroom at Cedar Bayou Jr. High School.
The teen was taken to the hospital and reported to be in stable condition.
• Juvenile Girl Will Not Be Charged for Abandoning Fetus on Airplane
• Click here to read more on this story from MyFOXHouston.com.
.
To save her Lab, Minneapolis woman bites pit bull on nose
Spare the woman-bites-dog jokes, Amy Rice say.
After futile attempts to pull a pit bull's jaws off her Labrador retriever's throat after it jumped a neighbor's fence Friday, Rice was forced to turn to animal instinct.
"I ended up biting the pit bull on the nose," said Rice, 38, whose dog, Ella, was attacked in her northeast Minneapolis yard. "I didn't plan it, that's what happened.
"I broke the skin and had pit bull blood in my mouth. I knew what happened, and I knew that it wasn't good."
Injuries to the pit bull were minor, but now Rice is dealing with a potential rabies scare as well as her 12-year-old dog's physical and emotional wounds.
The pit bull was quarantined Wednesday by Minneapolis Animal Control after Rice's doctor told her of a possible rabies threat.
.
Burglar caught faking death at funeral parlor
A Spanish burglar who broke into a funeral home tried to fool police by playing dead, but two things gave him away. First, he breathed. Plus, he wore grungy clothes rather than the Sunday best of those settling in for eternal rest. Police and the Crespo Funeral Home said Wednesday they had no idea what the 23-year-old Spanish man was trying to steal in the March 17 break-in at Burjassot, a small town just outside Valencia.
Neighbors living nearby alerted police when they heard the front door of the business being forced open in the middle of the night. Police officers arrived with the owner, and eventually found the suspect lying on a table in a glassed-in chamber used for viewings of deceased people during wakes. "The custom here is for dead people to be dressed in suits, in nice clothes that look presentable. This guy was in everyday clothes that were wrinkled and dirty," the police official said. "He was trying to fake being dead, but he was breathing."
.
Woman 'back from the dead'
A Peruvian woman declared clinically dead awoke as her surprised family prepared to put her body into a coffin. Lima daily La Republica reported that Felicita Guizabalo Viera, 33, suffered from cancer and was declared dead by a doctor on Saturday.
Two hours later, as her family prepared to hold her wake, she opened her eyes.
Guizabalo, whom her neighbors now call "the dead woman", says she remembers two men dressed in white carrying her through abysses and deserts, but that she begged God to let her return to her four children. The strange case occurred in Peru's northern La Libertad province.
A grunting weightlifter has been fined £70 for making his neighbors' lives a misery – by exercising too loudly.
Giran Jobe's two-hour training sessions in his top-floor flat were so loud they reached 100 decibels – the same level as a rock concert.
'All I do is exercise and work out with my weights. I am trying to keep fit. I cannot believe I got taken to court for exercising.'
.
Man believes dead wife is contacting him on cell phone
Frank Jones admits he believes wife Sadie is contacting him from beyond the grave ... by mobile phone.Mr Jones, who runs his own scrap metal business, said: "Just after Sadie died I came home and I felt like I didn't want to go in the house."I got a missed call on my mobile, but it didn't ring. The call was from my own home number, but there was nobody in the house." "Then when I went inside there was a smell like cigarettes which Sadie used to smoke and the smell of her perfume."Mr Jones said the family has also received strange text messages, which they believe to be from her. He added: "We buried her with her phone. There have been messages with words Sadie would say but there's no number."
.
Cops call woman about car; she tries to buy crack
LAKE CHARLES, La. - Police in Louisiana are crediting "sheer luck and stupidity" for the arrests of two people on drug charges after officers made a routine phone call. It all started last week when two police officers pulled over a car for a traffic violation. The driver could not produce identification or a valid driver's license, so the officers suspected the car was stolen.
They called the registered owner and left a message. When the owner called back, officers say, she apparently thought the message was from a drug dealer.
She was busted for allegedly trying to buy crack cocaine.
.
Man Robs Store Where He Frequently Did Business
LOUISVILLE, Ky. - A Louisville man is in jail after police said he robbed a check-cashing store where he often did business. Investigators said 25-year-old Alvin Gist robbed the First American Check Cashing store in the 5500 block of New Cut Road Tuesday.
A clerk recognized him as a frequent customer, checked his address and notified police.
When officers went to Gist's home, they said they found the money and the clothes worn during the robbery.
.
10-year-old Girl Tried To Rob Store
FRANKLIN, Tenn. - Police in Franklin said a 10-year-old girl tried to rob a Mapco Express late Monday night. Video: Police Say 10-Year-Old Tried To Rob Store The clerk said the main reason he called police was that he was worried about the girl being out so late and trying to rob a store.
He said he wasn’t sure what the girl wanted until she threw a rock that struck him in the chest. The rock was all she was armed with. The clerk said he was so stunned that the girl had to ask the clerk three times for the money.
.
Baby Born in Texas Middle School Bathroom Dies in Flush Attempt
BAYTOWN, Texas — A 14-year-old Texas teenager on Wednesday gave birth in the bathroom of a middle school but the baby died when the mother allegedly tried to flush it.
Police said the student told counselors she had given birth and attempted to flush the baby inside a restroom at Cedar Bayou Jr. High School.
The teen was taken to the hospital and reported to be in stable condition.
• Juvenile Girl Will Not Be Charged for Abandoning Fetus on Airplane
• Click here to read more on this story from MyFOXHouston.com.
.
To save her Lab, Minneapolis woman bites pit bull on nose
Spare the woman-bites-dog jokes, Amy Rice say.
After futile attempts to pull a pit bull's jaws off her Labrador retriever's throat after it jumped a neighbor's fence Friday, Rice was forced to turn to animal instinct.
"I ended up biting the pit bull on the nose," said Rice, 38, whose dog, Ella, was attacked in her northeast Minneapolis yard. "I didn't plan it, that's what happened.
"I broke the skin and had pit bull blood in my mouth. I knew what happened, and I knew that it wasn't good."
Injuries to the pit bull were minor, but now Rice is dealing with a potential rabies scare as well as her 12-year-old dog's physical and emotional wounds.
The pit bull was quarantined Wednesday by Minneapolis Animal Control after Rice's doctor told her of a possible rabies threat.
.
Burglar caught faking death at funeral parlor
A Spanish burglar who broke into a funeral home tried to fool police by playing dead, but two things gave him away. First, he breathed. Plus, he wore grungy clothes rather than the Sunday best of those settling in for eternal rest. Police and the Crespo Funeral Home said Wednesday they had no idea what the 23-year-old Spanish man was trying to steal in the March 17 break-in at Burjassot, a small town just outside Valencia.
Neighbors living nearby alerted police when they heard the front door of the business being forced open in the middle of the night. Police officers arrived with the owner, and eventually found the suspect lying on a table in a glassed-in chamber used for viewings of deceased people during wakes. "The custom here is for dead people to be dressed in suits, in nice clothes that look presentable. This guy was in everyday clothes that were wrinkled and dirty," the police official said. "He was trying to fake being dead, but he was breathing."
.
Woman 'back from the dead'
A Peruvian woman declared clinically dead awoke as her surprised family prepared to put her body into a coffin. Lima daily La Republica reported that Felicita Guizabalo Viera, 33, suffered from cancer and was declared dead by a doctor on Saturday.
Two hours later, as her family prepared to hold her wake, she opened her eyes.
Guizabalo, whom her neighbors now call "the dead woman", says she remembers two men dressed in white carrying her through abysses and deserts, but that she begged God to let her return to her four children. The strange case occurred in Peru's northern La Libertad province.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Calling From Hell
Queen Elizabeth II, George W Bush & Robert Mugabe died & went straight to hell.
.Queen Elizabeth II said "I miss Britain, I want to call Britain and see how everybody is doing there. She called and talked for about 5 minutes, then her Majesty asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "Five million dollars" She wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on her chair.
.
George Bush was so jealous, he began screaming, "My turn! I wanna call the United States, I want to see how everybody is doing there too" He called and talked for about 10 minutes, then he asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "Ten million dollars" With a smug look on his face, he made a cheque and went to sit back on his chair.
.
Robert Mugabe was even more jealous & started screaming, "I want to call Zimbabwe, I want to see how everybody is doing there. I wanna talk to the ministers, to the deputy, I wanna talk to everybody". He called Zimbabwe and he talked for about twenty hours, he talked & talked & talked, then he asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "One dollar". Mugabe is stunned & says "One dollar??? Only one lousy dollar??" The Devil says "Well if you make a call from hell to another hell, it's local"
Sweet Jesus
A group on nuns were traveling in a car when it got a flat tire. They got out and tried to change it, but being rather unworldly did not know how to do it.
Luckily, a truck came along and the male driver offered to change it for them. They gladly accepted. As the trucker jacked up the car, it slipped from the jack. “Son of a bitch,” he yelled.
The eldest nun said to him, “That is not nice language. We understand that you are upset, but you mustn’t use such language.”
“Sorry, Sister”, he said, and tried again. Again it slipped, this time almost mashing his fingers. “Son of a bitch,” he yelled again.
“Please, don’t use such language. If changing our tire is causing you to do so, it would be better if you didn’t help us.”
“But I get so upset, and it just comes out.”
“Well,” said the nun, “say something else when you get upset, something like ‘Sweet Jesus, help me’”.
So the trucker tried to jack up the car again. Again it slipped.
He started to say “So...”, but he corrected himself and said, “Sweet Jesus help me.” At that, the car just lifted up into the air by itself.
The nuns looked at the car floating a foot above the ground and in unison exclaimed, “Son of a bitch!”
Luckily, a truck came along and the male driver offered to change it for them. They gladly accepted. As the trucker jacked up the car, it slipped from the jack. “Son of a bitch,” he yelled.
The eldest nun said to him, “That is not nice language. We understand that you are upset, but you mustn’t use such language.”
“Sorry, Sister”, he said, and tried again. Again it slipped, this time almost mashing his fingers. “Son of a bitch,” he yelled again.
“Please, don’t use such language. If changing our tire is causing you to do so, it would be better if you didn’t help us.”
“But I get so upset, and it just comes out.”
“Well,” said the nun, “say something else when you get upset, something like ‘Sweet Jesus, help me’”.
So the trucker tried to jack up the car again. Again it slipped.
He started to say “So...”, but he corrected himself and said, “Sweet Jesus help me.” At that, the car just lifted up into the air by itself.
The nuns looked at the car floating a foot above the ground and in unison exclaimed, “Son of a bitch!”
Sexy paper lingerie a hit for the Chinese dead
Sexy lingerie sets have reportedly become a hit among Malaysia's ethnic Chinese, who buy them to offer to their dead relatives on the Qingming Festival this Friday. To mark the day, Chinese traditionally tend the graves of their departed loved ones and often burn paper money, model houses, cars, mobile phones and other goods as offerings to honor them and keep them comfortable in the afterlife."Most customers find them cute and would usually add a few sets to go with other paper clothing and items such as dresses, bags and shoes for their female family members to use in the other world," she said.Bra Bag
Apart from its original purpose, it's amazing what you can do with a bra.A new designer handbag company is recycling old bras and costume jewelry to fashion unique handbags.
Two Russian Journalists Cooked an Egg with their Cell Phones
Vladimir Lagovski and Andrei Moiseynko from Komsomolskaya Pravda Newspaper in Moscow decided to learn first-hand how harmful cell phones are. There is no magic in cooking with your cell phone. The secret is in the radio waves that the cell phone radiates. The journalists created a simple microwave structure as shown in the picture. They called from one cell phone to the other and left both phones on talking mode. They placed a tape recorder next to phones to imitate sounds of speaking so the phones would stay on.
After, 15 minutes: The egg became slightly warm. .
25 minutes: The egg became very warm.
.
40 minutes: The egg became very hot.
.
65 minutes: The egg was cooked. (As you can see.)
.
Conclusion:
To cook your brain, It would take a several hours non stop talking on a cell phone.
TimO said...
Nice to see in Russia they celebrate April Fool's Day too....
Small Bits of News
Bank Robber Left Behind Photo IDThe police said that Cory L. Brown, 26, of Brooklyn, robbed banks on Saturday and Sunday — and then left numerous forms of identification behind.
If only all bank robbers were so considerate, the police would have an easier time of it.
The New York City police announced this afternoon that they are searching for one Cory L. Brown, a 26-year-old homeless man who has been staying in a shelter in Brooklyn, for robbing about $3,800 from two banks over the weekend.
Man tries to rob restaurant, then orders meal
A Kalispell man will now be facing a slew of charges after allegedly attempting to rob Taco Johns with a replica of a Glock tactical pistol.
A Kalispell man will now be facing a slew of charges after allegedly attempting to rob Taco Johns with a replica of a Glock tactical pistol.
Officials with the Kalispell Police Department say that Shane Roe, 24, entered the business on Monday afternoon, displayed his pistol and then demanded free food. The employee refused, and then Roe is said to have laughed and demanded money from the register. The employee refused again. Roe then placed an order, paid for it and sat down with his female companion.
Officers later found Roe outside the Kalispell Center Mall and when he tried to hide his gun from view, he was arrested at gunpoint. The gun was later determined to be an air-soft pistol.
.
Bounced check leads to bank robbery charge in S.C.
SPARTANBURG, S.C. — Authorities say a man robbed a bank in South Carolina after the $173 check he tried to cash bounced. Police say the man gave a teller the personal check on Monday morning, but the teller couldn't cash it because there wasn't enough money in the account.
Authorities say the man told the teller he had to have the cash or someone was going to kill him. He wrote a note saying he was robbing the bank. Police say the teller gave the man some money and he ran away. Investigators say they have a suspect, but have not made an arrest.
SPARTANBURG, S.C. — Authorities say a man robbed a bank in South Carolina after the $173 check he tried to cash bounced. Police say the man gave a teller the personal check on Monday morning, but the teller couldn't cash it because there wasn't enough money in the account.
Authorities say the man told the teller he had to have the cash or someone was going to kill him. He wrote a note saying he was robbing the bank. Police say the teller gave the man some money and he ran away. Investigators say they have a suspect, but have not made an arrest.
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