Man Almost Loses His Penis During Sexual Satisfaction

Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.
He panicked and called the police to help him.
When police arrive they found Xian stuck face down where he had been stuck for some time.
When doctors arrived on the scene they tried to release some of the pressure by removing some of his blood, but the penis was so swollen that they ended up having to cut the entire bench free and take it, with Xian attached, to the hospital. Four painful hours later, Doctors finally separated Xian from his bench.
Doctors stated that if he had been stuck for even an hour longer, they would have had to remove his penis. This is probably one bad date that Xing will never forget.
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Now who has the biggest trouser snake?

Snake Slithers Into Reporters Pants On Live TV
During a live broadcast from the Iowa State Fair, A snake gets grabby with a KCCI meteorologist.
A giant Burmese python slithered into a weatherman's shorts on live television.KCCI meteorologist, Kurtis Gertz, was reporting from the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines yesterday when a trainer placed the snake on his shoulders.
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Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

Want Cocaine Buy a Police Car
Kevin Blais bought the 2004 Ford Crown Victoria in an online auction from the Hartford, Conn., public works department.
He was cleaning it last week when he noticed a cracked area on the one-piece molded seat assembly. When he removed the seat assembly to clean the floor, he found a plastic bag containing a substance that local police later confirmed was cocaine.
Blais speculates that a suspect stuffed the drugs through the crack to prevent police from finding them. Burrillville Lt. Kevin San Antonio says Hartford police were "apologetic" when he told them of the discovery.
Hartford police spokeswoman Nancy Mulroy said Friday that based on their past experience with drug suspects, Blais' speculation is almost certainly correct. "It's not unusual that perpetrators or suspects try to hide stuff in the cruisers before they go to booking, where they know they'll be searched."
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Hackers Gather in Vegas to Share Tips on Attacking Networked World
Want to break into the computer network in an ultra-secure building? Ship a hacked iPhone there to a nonexistent employee and hope the device sits in the mailroom, scanning for nearby wireless connections.
How about stealing someone's computer passwords? Forget trying to fool the person into downloading a malicious program that logs keystrokes. A tiny microphone hidden near the keyboard could do the same thing, since each keystroke emits slightly different sounds that can be used to reconstruct the words the target is typing.
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British Man Decapitates Himself
In a grim attempt at revenge against his estranged wife, a British man committed suicide by decapitation in his Aston Martin sports car. Gerald Mellin, 54, had been consumed with dark thoughts surrounding his 34-year-old wife's decision to leave him.
The day before his death, a court had granted Mirielle Mellin additional alimony.
Following the decision, in the last contact with his wife, Mellin sent a text message reading, "Congratulations, XXX."
The man then reportedly tied one end of a rope to a tree and wrapped the other end of it around his neck as he sat in the driver's seat. He then drove the car at a high speed onto a busy road, forcing other drivers to witness his violent suicide.
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The Almighty Supremebeing Allah - Arrested
Members of the East Central Narcotics Task Force arrested a West Hartford man was arrested after a short chase in South Windsor Thursday evening.According to police, Almighty Supremebeing Allah, 35, of 119 Elmhurst St. West Hartford refused to stop for a marked cruiser and was detained about a mile down the road after the initial stop.He was charged with Reckless Driving, Disobeying an Officers Signal, Interfering with an Officer, Criminal Attempt/Sale of Cocaine Criminal Attempt/Possession of Cocaine.
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Over 3,000 Minnesotans Arrested for DWI in July
3,094 drunk driving arrests were made across Minnesota in July, according to the state Dept. of Public Safety. 278 of the roughly 400 participating law enforcement agencies, and 10 out of 11 State Patrol districts reported DWI arrests during the month.
Average drunk driver was double the limit The average alcohol-concentration of the DWI offenders was 0.15 -- nearly twice the legal limit of 0.08.
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Copper Theft: "Inside Job
Six men, including three former workers at the General Electric facility on Scenic Highway in Pensacola, have been accused of stealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of copper wire. "This is the largest copper theft ring we've ever seen," says Escambia County Sheriff Ron McNesby. "The men stole 63,000 pounds of copper, valued at $367,000 dollars." The six men have been arrested and charged with grand theft. Warrants are out for three other men (Cordero Smith, Eugene Roberson, Howard English) believed to be involved in the major theft ring.
NEWS VIDEO
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Boy Stabbed In The Head, Forgives Attacker
Tracy Squaire is one lucky kid. The 12-year old Pensacola boy was stabbed in the head and lived to talk about it."I'm still alive," says Squaire. "I didn't get any brain damage."Squaire says his 14-year old neighbor stabbed him just above the ear during an argument. The young boy has five staples in his head to hold the wound together."It was scary," says Squaire. "Just knowing you got stabbed and there was blood everywhere. She just jumped in my face and I pushed her away and then she ran off, grabbed a knife and stabbed me."
NEWS VIDEO
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Anyone up for the Challenge

Mount Huashan, one of China's Five Holy Mountains.
The trail was composed almost entire of stone steps, steps that led up for two miles into the sky. At several points, the steps were no more than carvings into the mountainside. Luckily, who ever built this trail thought to include chains bolted into the rock. As you might imagine, this made climbing the carved steps possible.

You are one with the rock

It's Finally Friday

Friday_vs_Monday

Olympic Online Coverage has Insane Demand

The Beijing 2008 Olympic Games kick off on August 8th, and the Web will be an important destination for sport lovers who want to be able to watch all of the action from their favorite events online.
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Watch Beijing 2008 Olympics Online For Free
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Thanks Chris

Assorted Images

Meet My Mechanic.
Do You Think My Husband Will Notice?
"Oh! My Balls"
Got Taken Down By A Female Cop.

You're not so tough after all are you.
Caption This......

That's Just Crazy

88 on 8/8/08
Darrell Grinnell's favorite card game is 500, but this year it might as well be Crazy Eights. Grinnell will celebrate his 88th birthday Friday, on 8/8/08. "We've never really celebrated my birthday before," he said. "We get each other cards and eat out sometimes, but nothing really grand or spectacular." This birthday, however, really does call for a celebration. Darrell has undergone a series of three spinal surgeries in the past year. "Other than that, my health's been pretty good," said the octogenarian, who still dabbles in woodworking. "I've had health problems, but I feel good." He and his wife, Jean, who turned 88 in June, will mark the milestone with a gathering of family and friends. If they track down the whole family, the gathering will be a big one.

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Artist at Work - NSFW

Very Funny Prank

Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

Police Raid Mayor's Home, Seize Drugs, Kill His Dogs
A small town mayor whose house was raided and dogs were killed by police appears to be an innocent victim of a drug smuggling scheme, authorities said.
Police kicked in the door and stormed the home of the mayor of Berwyn Heights, Maryland, shooting two black Labradors and seizing an unopened package with 32 pounds of marijuana inside. But the drugs evidently did not belong to him or his wife.
Police say Cheye Calvo and his wife appeared to be victims of a plan by two men to smuggle millions of dollars worth of marijuana by having it delivered to about a half-dozen unsuspecting recipients.
The two men under arrest include a FedEx package deliveryman; investigators said the deliveryman would drop off a package outside a home, and the other man would come by a short time later and pick it up.
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26 Texas Cheerleaders Squeeze Into Elevator
Pyramids of Texan cheerleaders might be impressive, but University of Texas security wasn’t amused by a cube of 26 teens that squeezed into, and stalled, a campus elevator Tuesday night.
The group of 14- to 17-year-olds was inspired to test an elevator’s maximum capacity while attending cheerleading camp at the university, The Dallas Morning News reported. When the elevator stalled en route from the fourth to the first floor, several girls panicked.
The girls "managed to wiggle a few cell phones free to call for help," the paper reported. Police and fire crew responded, but it took an elevator repairman 25 minutes to extricate the squad.
One of the girls fainted and two others were treated at the scene.
"It's actually dangerous, there are signs everywhere: No more than 15 people or 3,000 pounds."
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Grandma Arrested for Driving With 3-Year-Old on Roof for Fun
Authorities say a grandmother was arrested for driving around the parking lot of a Marathon grocery store with her 3-year-old child sitting on the roof of the car.
Monroe County Sheriff's Office deputies were called to the Publix store Tuesday and arrested a 54-year-old woman after she was driving around with her three-year-old granddaughter on the roof of her car.
The grandmother was released from jail 15 hours later.
The woman said Thursday she would never let anything hurt her granddaughter. She says she was driving at "snail-speed" and holding the child's leg.
Authorities say the woman told police she was giving the child some air and letting her have fun.
She faces charges of child abuse. The child is back with her mother.
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Woman kills boyfriend for drinking her beer
A West Side woman who allegedly stabbed her elderly boyfriend to death because he was drinking her beer was ordered held in lieu of $500,000 bail.
Regina Williams, 55, of the 1000 block of North Waller Avenue appeared in Cook County Bond Court before Judge Israel Desierto, charged with first-degree murder in the slaying of Willie Anderson, 77, of the 2200 block of West Monroe Street.
The two were sitting in Anderson's car outside his home when Williams became angry that he was drinking her beer, authorities said. They began to quarrel, and Williams allegedly pulled a knife she carried for protection and began stabbing Anderson. Anderson yelled for help, but Williams continued to stab him.
Afterwards, Williams got out of the car and called down the street to Anderson's nephew, saying, "You better come get your uncle—I just killed him."
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To Serve, Protect and Demanding Free Java
Though many police departments officially frown on freebies, coffee houses and restaurants around the city and suburbs give the gratis, and the officers' bosses seem to look the other way.
But there's another unwritten rule: Cops can't demand the free stuff. And that's just what officials say Chicago Police Officer Barbara Nevers did, demanding free coffee and pastries from a half-dozen Starbucks stores over the years, until she was banned from one of the java joints and a memo was sent to other stores.
The 55-year-old veteran of more than a decade was suspended for 18 months and recommended for counseling after showing her gun and badge to intimidate employees into giving her free coffee,
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Woman picks the wrong house to stop for directions
A woman who allegedly was driving while intoxicated in the Sturgis area picked the wrong house to stop at. Meade County Sheriff Ron Merwin said a 37-year-old woman got lost about 4 a.m. Tuesday and stopped at a home to get directions.
The house belongs to one of the sheriff's deputies. The female deputy believed that the woman was intoxicated and would not let her drive away. Merwin said that resulted in a wrestling match. The woman was jailed on charges of felony drunken driving and assaulting the deputy.
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Blonde's noisy sex is not making for a good neighbor
She has made her neighbors’ lives a living hell for 2½ years — with her noisy BONKING.
Screaming Kerry Norris, 29, regularly keeps at it until 6am — her headboard banging her wall.
Shocked neighbor Michelle Tyrrell yesterday told JPs how her daughter aged four asked her: "Mummy — what does ‘f*** me’ mean’?"
Michelle — who also said Norris sunbathed naked in full view of workmen — said: "My daughter has nightmares because of what she heard."
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Surprise Birthday Present
A woman was left "absolutely distraught" after she excitedly opened a birthday present only to discover a dismembered pig’s head.
The box was delivered to Kim Teague days before her 50th birthday and was tied up with ribbons and a helium balloon.
But instead of a present it contained the head lying on a bed of tissue paper and the words: "Fat c***" written on the flaps of the box.
The message RIP was scrawled on the pig’s forehead.
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Nigerian advises against 86 wives
Nigerian Mohammed Bello Abubakar, 84, has advised other men not to follow his example and marry 86 women.
The former teacher and Muslim preacher, who lives with his wives and at least 170 children,
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Firefighters fight blaze at own firehouse
Firefighters in Lacona in south-central Iowa have had to battle at blaze at their own headquarters. Fire Chief Brian Hoffman says a fire broke out at the building that houses the fire department, library, City Hall and a barbershop. There were no injuries.
Hoffman says the flames were contained to the east end of the building and no fire equipment was damaged. Damage estimates weren't immediately available. The cause of the fire remains under investigation.