Thursday, October 23, 2008

Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

A woman shoplifter, brandish a used female sanitary napkin
A 27-year-old woman accused of shoplifting cologne and trying to touch an officer with a "well-used and bloody female sanitary napkin" Tuesday is facing charges, according to an arrest affidavit released Wednesday.
Ermith Emonfils, of the 400 block of North 14th Street, was stopped after allegedly walking out of a Walgreen's on Orange Avenue without paying for a $29.99 box of Elizabeth Arden Mediterranean cologne. Emonfils also had a bottle of bright green Sinful Colors nail polish and a package of "extra long" black fake eyelashes.
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That's certainly well beyond "gross".
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That's just bloody disgusting!
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WTF? They should have used the taser...
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Kids Found Living Among Rattlesnakes in Filthy New Mexico Home
Two Deming residents were arrested on child abuse charges after Luna County Sheriff's investigators found four children living in an unkempt home where rattlesnakes were caged in chicken wire.
Frederick Probst, 31, and Heather Billy, 22, each face four counts of child abuse, a third-degree felony. The children — ages 7, 3, 1 year and 6 months — were taken into custody by state social workers.
Deputies responded Friday to a report of a 3-year-old boy walking and running barefoot.
They discovered the children at a home that had a non-working toilet, dirty dishes piled in a sink, no running water and a child in soiled diapers. The home had animal and human feces inside and other evidence of poor child care.
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That's just wrong to treat kids that way the two adults must been on drugs or drunks.
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Naked man screams about Satan, runs from police
A naked man acting erratically and yelling about Satan shocked some people early Wednesday and gave chase to several Iowa City Police officers.
Sgt. Troy Kelsay said it took seven patrol officers to subdue an 18-year-old man who was witnessed by at least six people running around naked on the 800 block of Iowa Avenue. Kelsay declined to identify the man.
The first report of man came to officers at 5:55 a.m. Wednesday. The caller said a man was in the median of Iowa Avenue screaming obscenities. Kelsay said that caller gave a clothing description for the man. However, subsequent calls and in-person reports to the police station indicated the man shed his clothes.
Among the multiple witnesses was a woman who said he yelled at her as she walked down Iowa Avenue. Another caller said the man was lying down in the median of the street. Kelsay said the man was showing "very erratic, bizarre behavior."
"He was screaming about heaven, screaming about hell, screaming about Satan," Kelsay said.
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Bust nets 95 lbs. of pot
A routine traffic stop in Coralville became a bit more complicated when police officers allegedly found more than 80 pounds of marijuana in the cargo area of the van.
George Randall Ranshaw, 57, of 2128 S. Riverside Drive No. 94 in Iowa City, was arrested for possession of marijuana with intent to deliver and an Iowa drug stamp violation, according to a statement from police.
After police executed a search warrant, they found another 15 pounds of marijuana at Ranshaw's home.
According to police, Ranshaw was stopped by a police officer at 2 a.m. for speeding on First Avenue north of Holiday Road.
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This guy wasn't very smart when you're breaking the law first thing is not draw attention to yourself.
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Robbery Suspect Identified By Severed Thumb
Police say a man suspected in an armed robbery at an alleged brothel in Washington, D.C. left a key piece of evidence at the scene — his thumb.
Police say 22-year-old Bryan Perez and an accomplice made off with hundreds of dollars in cash in the Oct. 11 raid. According to charging documents, one of the victims took control of Perez's silver machete and hacked off his right thumb.
About two hours after the robbery, a nine-fingered Perez went to an emergency room. Police caught up with him and brought the severed thumb to the hospital.
According to an arrest affidavit, a doctor told police the thumb "fits like a puzzle piece." Perez was transferred to a Baltimore hospital to have it reattached.
On Tuesday, a judge ordered the Hyattsville, Md., man held without bond.
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LOL

Widow
To get acquainted with his new Parish, the Priest decided to call on some daily. One he selected was a young widow, her husband, according to the index card, had died two years ago.
After knocking at the door, he was greeted by a young lady with a baby in her arms.
He said, "I’m sorry, I must have the wrong address, I was looking for the widow Smith."
"You’ve found her, Father," smiled the lady.
"Well, according to the card here, it says your husband died over two years ago." he said glancing at the baby in her arms.
"That’s correct, Father, he surely did. But I didn’t."
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Calling in Work Sick
A guy works a new job on Thursday and Friday. On Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick."
He works the rest of the week, but the following Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick."
The boss asks the foreman about him, and the foreman says, "He's great. He does the work of two men. We need him."
So the boss calls the guy into his office, and says, "You seem to have a problem getting to work on Mondays. You're a good worker and I'd hate to fire you. What's the problem? Anything we can help you with? Drugs? Alcohol?"
The guy says, "No, I don't drink or do drugs. But my brother-in-law drinks every weekend, and then beats on my sister. So every Monday morning, I go over to make sure she's all right. She puts her head on my shoulder and cries, one thing leads to another, and the next thing you know, I'm fucking her."
The boss says, "You fuck your sister?"
The guy says, "Hey, I told you I was sick."

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Perfect Butts

I am Jealous of that man I wish it was me.

Driver Ignores A Red Light

What do you want to bet the driver was texting while driving.

Good Advice

Watch what you do in life you might end up in a hole that you can’t get out.

What goes around comes around


I'm going to Hell....

....Michigan


I’m going to Hell you want anything while I’m there?
No I just see you there.

The BEST Halloween Costume EVER!!!

Anonymous said...
SLANK!!!

Cameraman Curiosity Almost Got Him Killed

It's hard to tell if the cameraman is real because he stands so still
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That was a little too close for comfort for me!
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I was waiting for the urine wet spot to form on the trousers.

Small Bits of News You Didn’t Know you Needed

Fake cop pulled over real officer
Rule number one if you’re dumb enough to impersonate an police officer don’t do it to a real police officer it never works.
Hartford police say a city man picked the wrong time to impersonate a police officer.
Authorities say they arrested 20-year-old Israel Gomez early Tuesday when he pulled over a motorist who just happened to be an off-duty Hartford police lieutenant. Another car driven by Gomez's alleged accomplice was also involved in the bogus traffic stop.
Police say Gomez turned on flashing lights on his 1994 Honda Civic, sounded a siren and used a loudspeaker to order Lt. Ronald Bair to pull over. Bair called for backup, and officers arrested Gomez and 20-year-old Esteban Cardona.
Gomez is charged with impersonating a police officer, reckless driving and improper use of red flashing lights.
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Woman found out Alcohol and Driving Test doesn’t go together
A woman was disqualified from her driving test after she failed a breath-test - on the written section of her exam.
Monika Cristescu, 20, from Arad, was found to be double the drunk driving limit after admitting she'd downed "only four gins" to cope with nerves.
Police withdrew her licence application and banned her from taking the driving theory paper until she shows up sober.
A police spokesman said: "She turned up to do the test and a few minutes into it she started giggling, talking loudly to the other candidates in the room, shouting out the answers she was giving and telling them she was going to get every question right.
"An officer walked over to her and immediately smelt alcohol and decided to give her a breath test.
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Beauty Queen Arrested After Skipping on Restaurant Bill
Reigning Miss Teen Louisiana USA Lindsey Evans and three friends were arrested over the weekend for leaving a Bossier City restaurant without paying their bill.
Police say the 18-year-old Evans of Blanchard left her purse at the restaurant and the women were arrested when they returned to get it.
Police spokesman Mark Natale says Evans and her friends were booked Saturday night on charges of theft after they ran up a $46.07 bill and left without paying. He says the women admitted intentionally leaving without paying their bill.
In addition to the theft charge, Evans was booked with possession of marijuana that was found in her purse. The other women face similar charges. All four were released from jail Sunday after posting bond.
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Woman, 76, Arrested for 73rd Time When Wallet Disappears
A 76-year-old woman who gave her address as 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. has been arrested for the 73rd time in almost four decades, this time on charges of stealing a police decoy wallet in a supermarket and stuffing it in her bra.
The woman, who prosecutors say has used 36 aliases, was indicted Tuesday as Katherine Kelly in Manhattan Criminal Court in connection with the wallet. Prosecutors reported the indictment but didn't disclose the charges.
A criminal complaint filed earlier in this case charged Kelly with grand larceny and attempted grand larceny. It said she took a wallet, left by police as bait, from a shopping cart in a supermarket. A officer recovered the wallet from Kelly's "bra area."
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Gas Prices Maybe Falling but Pot Prices Probably Rise
Hunters Discover Marijuana Farm Worth Millions in Utah Mountains
Hunters in central Utah hoping to find some deer this weekend stumbled instead on a marijuana farm worth millions growing in the mountains.
The pot plant collection is the latest of several discovered in Utah in recent weeks, this one estimated to contain several thousand plants.
One hunter described the scene as "quite an operation" complete with a pressurized watering system using a spring from the mountain.
The hunters also found two men watering the plants, one allegedly armed with a handgun, who police believe were actually living at the site and guarding the operation.
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